I now realize how my Mom and my Dad probably felt when they were being hurried to complete a task. My two wonderful daughters were helping me today with some computer work. My friend Harry Urban has a background in computers and website design. While I am fairly savvy with computers, I knew nothing about website design until I purchased the templates and began working on the website. With a little coaching from Harry, I have been able to bring this website to its current state.
Since the beginning of dementia, there has been a stigma associated with it. As a result of this stigma, persons with dementia have remained largely quiet about their disease. Now, many persons with dementia are stepping forward and sharing their experiences and the impact they have on their lives. Our sharing what it is like inside our brains can have a huge impact on care partners. As they understand what we are experiencing, they will be better able to provide care with less stress and agitation in their own lives. I feel that I have been gifted with being able to discern what is taking place inside my body and explain it to others. I will be sharing my experiences in my life and hope they will help others and their families.
Even though I have dementia, I love the fact that I am still able to challenge my brain and continue to learn. I may be slower; but, I am still highly functioning. My two daughters and I were working on the website. We were trying to hurry so that Kelli could drive me to the grocery store. It was taking longer than usual to complete what we were doing. My wife has both systemic lupus and rheumatoid arthritis. She needed to go to bed and there were three grandchildren that she would be with alone with if we went to the grocery store. Inside my brain felt scrambled. Kelli and I had three stores that we needed to go to. Unfortunately as a result of my not planning the best sequence of store visits, I became very agitated and again my brain felt as if it was scrambled.
When these feelings occur, I become light-headed, agitated, frustrated, and hopeless. I often start shaking and crying. It is very frightening. I have no idea how to change the course that is taking place. Fortunately for me, Kelli took control and in her calm and sweet spirit calmed the storm. I am so thankful that I have an understanding family that is with me to the bitter end.
Robert Bowles, Jr.